Failure

I've been on Otezla for 4 weeks now, I had high hopes for it after failing phototherapy and ciclosporine. My doctor was ready to swear by this new one. I had no side effects for the first 9 days, then everything just hit me. I read so much into side effects etc and I thought "I already have most of these, how bad can it be?" turns out so very bad. Going to bed in tears every night, I've never had such aches and pains all over my body before. Depression has gone from my little friend in the corner that I can ignore, to this all consuming monster. Psoriasis is hard enough to deal with, but psoriasis and everything that being on Otezla has brought on makes psoriasis seem like a lovely walk in the park. Am I a total failure if I tell my doctor I don't want to take these tablets anymore, because of what they're doing to me? I feel like such a quitter for wanting to give them up after just 4 weeks.