White Coat Syndrome / derm/rheum apps

Hi. I am a 51 year old female, plaque p since age 7 after suffering from ear infections. Started on elbows, then scalp, pretty much then moved around body. Diagnosed with pa aged 27 after the birth of second child, never showed inflammation in bloods was diagnosed by symptoms and swelling in middle toe. Hip pain and severe fatigue followed for several years, kept company by foot pain on walking, three children, full time job, coping was difficult. Fast forward to now, I feel exactly the same as in my worst times when I was much younger. I have never liked the Dr's surgery, and after my experience of the rheumatology and dermatology consultants I'm trying my hardest to pluck up the courage to go. I just remember never being listened to. At one point I was asked whether I preferred skin cancer as I had enquired about light therapy treatment or the inconvenience of applying creams to my extensive p. Unless you have either of these diseases you can't possibly imagine the negative impact on a person's psyche. I feel guilty because I have these conditions It's madness as I'm struggling and internalising, I must be I'm on here for the first time in years. Does any one else feel like this?