My psoriasis, psychological issues and a girl

Posted Thu 15 Dec 2016 16.56 by AnoGuy

Hi all new to the forums A little about myself I'm a regular guy hitting 32 years of age this december. I wanted to ask you guys advice because I'm feeling confused and doubtful about a situation which has arisen in my life. I've had psoriasis since I was 18, on my elbows, scalp, behind my ears and some on and off (small patches) around my right eye and cheek, which is usually not that noticeable (except these days its more noticeable). When I was 27 I had a psychosis and have been struggling with psychological issues that last 4-5 years, trying to find my way back to a functional existence. At the moment I'm doing okay I guess, I managed to keep my education going and get good results and I'll get my bachelors degree this summer. The thing is everything else in my life has been on hold, especially the romantic side of it. There's this girl... I've known her for years and weve always been friendly to each other but nothing romantic has even happended. Last saturday we were at the same party, nothing directly happened but we ended up crashing in a bed together at the end of the evening and spending the night together in that bed. Again nothing really happened we just lied there, having small talk - drunk as we were - woke up the next morning, hugged each other goodbye and that was it. It's been days now and for some reason I really can't get her out of my mind, lost my appetite, lost my motivation for other things like exam projects and generally doing anything useful. I feel a very strong urge to do something about it and ask her out... the thing is I don't feel as confident as I used to, due to how I've lived my life the last 4-5 years. I'm completely in love with this gir it seems, but due to my issues I've grown doubtful and afraid of acting (as I probably would have done before the psychosis). Do any of you have any advice for me? I don't really feel like I can share this with anyone I know atm but I know I have to do something. I've always thought she was a special person but this time I know for certain I could develop real feelings for her. I don't know what to do I feel like my doubts about my psoriasis and myself are all coming back and crippling me from taking action. I made this post because I feel powerless and really need some sort of input from other people. Anyways thanks for reading all, any advice you might have is greatly appreciated! Kind regards, a doubtful fool

Posted Sat 21 Jan 2017 18.31 by thin-skinned
Irascible septuagenarian fed up with the psoriasis constantly at me :wink:

Perhaps a bold approach would be in order rather than self doubt. Explain that although you would like to take her out to a place of her choice, you do have some skin problems and ask how she would feel accompanying someone with less that perfect skin. If she then says no then you have lost nothing. but she could agree and then the rest is up to both of you.

Posted Mon 23 Jan 2017 17.02 by amani

anoguy..u gotta tell her about your feeling & your conditions.. remember, not everyone will push you away just because you are not perfect. wish u all the best and try virgin coconut oil. it help's..

Posted Tue 24 Jan 2017 05.41 by ohwell

Not sure where to begin sir. "I could develop real feelings" you have them or you do not, correct. I slept with a woman or you did not ? which one? Had a cuddle and walked away.? This has absolutely nothing to do with psoriasis, everything to do with your insecurity. Stop looking at it from your viewpoint, what about the lady ? What is she thinking?

Posted Tue 24 Jan 2017 08.51 by amani

I really understand that feeling. and I'm facing the same situation rite now except for my husband. before this I only had fewer white red patches behind my back but recently it spread all over my body except my face. it really embarrassing & I feel so uneasy when sitting next to him..hurmm. can't think what will happen in the future..

Posted Tue 24 Jan 2017 13.30 by AnoGuy

Thanks for all the suggestions and advice but since it took so long for anything to happen in this thread I actually starting dating her a long time ago. She's not easy tbh but worth it. Ohwell: Psoriasis has everything to do with insecurities. That's the main problem with it (besides the obvious) it makes you insecure about yourself. So yeah psoriasis and insecurities has everything to do with each other.

Posted Tue 24 Jan 2017 18.11 by ohwell

I am sorry I did not respond earlier, I am quite new to this too. Never mind the bloody skin. All relationships take work. So no worries, my other puts Dovobet on me. If what you say is correct, and there is no reason to doubt, she knew and did not need to be told. Stick the oil in the bath, use the creams, but above all get yourself a consultant. Pref from a teaching hospital. Don't take no, the pain is odd, consultants know this, not sure GP's do. Tell your lady when you are in pain, she wont know. Make sure you are an outpatient all the lotions and potions are, well ,paid for via taxes. Other than that get an EHIC card.

Posted Tue 24 Jan 2017 18.34 by ohwell

The EHIC will help you in the EC - well at least for now. Other than that get a prescription prepayment card. It costs but .... you want to see the cost of these things. And as it's incurable we will all be on stuff forever. Good thought but true. However as an outpatient the hospital provides the stuff. Other than that be treated via a consultant dermatoligist as an outpatient. get your GP to refer you. Mine said that he did not know what to do so I was referred.

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